Monday, May 17, 2010

not being grown-up for a change.

I was 17 years old, just graduated from high school, when i came to Chicago - with all my precious belongings in tow. Between now and then, I graduated from college, spent my first adult years in the city...which includes finding my first full-time job, paying for bills, paying for rent, learning to budget, going to bed early 'cause of work in the morning...blah...blah...blah.

It's hard to believe that was nearly 8 years ago.

As of two weeks ago, I made
a decision. I always thought this end of the season would end with fireworks or maybe a bigger paycheck or a huge brand-new adventure, but I sense that instead it concludes with peacefulness and closure. And it's so not a bad thing.

It's the end of a very good season in my time in Chicago. This city has been good to me. I've loved it - and I've already become emotional the more i think about the big move, but it's just time. I've sought the Lord on it and I sense His perfect peace and guidance. I don't know how else to explain it.

So you ask, What's the plan?

There really is none.
None?! Are you freakin' kidding me?!
(Oh man, even for say that is so out of my comfort zone.)

But it actually feels so freeing to say that. No plan. The only "plan" right now is to road-trip to Atlanta, GA with my bf, spend time with him and his family, and then we'll continue to the trek to my home in South Carolina.

I cannot wait to be home with the family I can't wait to wake up to Mom's good cooking and the coffee already brewing. I can't wait to hear Peyton whining at all the closed bedroom doors, begging for us to all finally get up and start the day. It'll just be so wonderful to be with family.

Like I said, there is no immediate plan. I know eventually I'll have to be in grown-up mode again and figure out what I'm doing next, but right now I just feel that this is an opportunity I cannot pass up. I mean, when is the next time that I can go home and just be with family for a change? It might be a month or two...who knows?

And a lot of people won't understand my reasons, but I do. I've sought the Lord; He has given me peace. Ryan is supportive. The family can't wait.

So why not?

For now, I enjoy the time I have left in Chicago. I'll miss this place. I'll miss the people. It's been good to me.

There truly is a time and a season for everything. And that is so not a bad thing...not at all.


  1. So exciting friend! I will be praying as you transition! When do you leave? I need to get some Ilene time in!!!!

  2. Good luck! I did the same when I was out of college... lived in Boston for a few years but then when my husband and I wanted to have children, our priorities changed and we wanted to be near family!

    Cute blog!
    XO Jill

  3. kirra: girl, let's def. do that this summer! i'd love it. we'll figure out something soon. :)

    jill: thanks for the encouragement! it's def. needed when you are taking leaps of faith. :)

  4. great post. how exciting!!!

    you should definitely try the cupcakes in a jar. they were surprisingly easy!!

    i just used a cake mix and found the jars for 7 it was a super inexpensive, but so fun party favor!

  5. I am excited for you to come home and relax. Just enjoy doing nothing.


  6. Change is always hard but so good for the soul. You are so brave! Good luck!

  7. kim: thanks, friend! you are always so sweet and encouraging to me. :)

    mom: i can't wait either - love you!

    silverstrands: thanks for your comment. it's such a good reminder! p.s. love your blog. thanks for sharing. :)

  8. When you get back to SC, I'll have to make a road trip to see you! It's definitely an easier trip to make than to Chicago! Enjoy your time with your family. It all goes too quickly. I look back and wish I had spent more summers at home during college. Even now, I cherish the time I get to spend with my parents.

  9. well, ilene, this post just makes me want to cry! i always smile in my heart when i read about you getting to be with your family. i think this is just fabulous!


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